12 Days of Christmas set

OK, you know the song:

• 12 Drummers Drumming
• 11 Pipers Piping
• 10 Lords-a-Leaping
• 9 Ladies Dancing
• 8 Maids-a-Milking
• 7 Swans-a-Swimming
• 6 Geese-a-Laying
• 5 Gold Rings
• 4 Colly Birds
• 3 French Hens
• 2 Turtle Doves
• And a Partridge in a Pear Tree

But what about the set? Well I don't exactly know it either but I sure as heck swam it this weekend...and I hated it. But that's only because I don't believe that the "other strokes" should be allowed into a civilized swimming pool. Each number represents the number of 25 yard laps in that part of the set and then, from there, the coach would make up something painful and seemingly arbitrary about how to interpret the lyrics. He

• 12 Drummers Drumming
  
• 11 Pipers Piping = something to do with Indiana IM and FYI, the leader in my lane made us do 13 of these, some Christmas spirit
  
• 10 Lords-a-Leaping = 5 50's with 5 "streamline jumps" in the shallow end
  
• 9 Ladies Dancing = 9 laps of backstroke
  
• 8 Maids-a-Milking = 8 laps of breast stroke
  
• 7 Swans-a-Swimming = 7 laps of butterfly
  
• 6 Geese-a-Laying
• 5 Gold Rings = 5 sprint 25s of freestyle
  
• 4 Colly Birds
• 3 French Hens = 3 laps of descending freestyle
  
• 2 Turtle Doves = 2 laps underwater
  
• And a Partridge in a Pear Tree = 1 lap of sculling while singing a Christmas Carol

When, and if, I remember the rest, I'll edit this post to benefit future generations and general internet knowledge.

Now, here's the funny part. I consider myself a smart man; truly, it's the only thing I have going for myself but sometimes I have to wonder about even that. Two days after swimming this set, I was in the middle of a 300 yard freestyle set, just the sort of swim that's long enough to let your mind wander (in the hopes that you make a mistake and only swim 250), when it occured to me why the 8 maids a milking were doing the breast stroke. Seriously, the coach on deck even pantomimed milking while describing it and I still didn't get it. Sheesh.

Merry Christmas and to all a good swim.